It's strange how it's only when someone's gone that you realise how big of a part of your life they actually were. I never realised how much I spoke to you until now, because before I would just pick up my phone without thinking about it and send you a message. Ever since I found out you've been gone though, I keep picking up my phone to talk to you only to suddenly realise that you're not here anymore, and that I can't talk to you. Today I felt especially sad, because I did something that would make you laugh and I wanted to tell you about it so badly but all day I just kept remembering that I couldn't. It was something that I probably would've only told you about, just because out of everyone I know, you would have been the one to find it as funny as I do. Not being able to talk to you anymore really just breaks my heart. I was so excited for you to come back to uni next year and it still hasn't really sunk in that I'll never see you again. You've always been such a funny, loveable - very insane! - and special friend to me and I will always miss you. I hope that you're in a better place now, Fahad x